yesterday was nt feeling very gd..yeah..cos there was something happened during work..yeah..some mistakes that are rather serious..that made everything quite a mess..hmm..it's quite a complicated things to describe it here..yeah..yesterday straight after i reached home, told jia ning about it..the first time working so far that made me feel like crying..okie lar..it really made my tear dropped..at home..when i spoke to jn abt it..had quite a mixed feeling about it..a little bit of bu4 gan1 xin1..a little bit of guilty..a little bit of dunno what to do..okie well..the root of the problem is a misunderstanding that arises from communication problem..yeah..well, my supervisor and i communicate in french..but u know lar..sometimes i get it, sometimes i don't..aiyah...damn complicated lar..if only ppl here speak english or chinese.. yeah..so the root of the problem leads to a much bigger problem in the end..a much more serious consequences..something that i really didn't expect..didn't know what trouble is ahead of me..

i really feel like saying 'i don't know' because i really don't know..but i know that these words isn't an excuse...'n shouldn't be used as an excuse..so juz gotta admit that the problem arises because of me lor..

hmm..anyway, yesterday was really quite a mess..that make my heart feel rather heavy..feel like running away from the situation at that time..but i can't..still have to face it..argh..juz feel like shouting it off..today, after a gd sleep..feel at least better liao..dun feel like thinking about yesterday..

'n u know what..as u know, my job needs me to face people all the times..even when i feel gd or bad..yeah..so even when there was something crops up in the middle of service, like yesterday..i still have to give that 'big smile' when i go out ..that fake smile..it's rather hard..i mean i tried not to let my feeling and emotion to influence my work..but i know myself...i am such an emotional person..after working here..i really learn a lot about controlling my emotions..have to be professional all the times..

yeah..every work has their ups and downs..nt always smooth..i know that..that's why i tried to take it easy..'tried'..haha..is actually lying to myself..cos i know no matter what..i still mind it..